8 leadership lessons from Nelson Mandela

Hello Reader,

I would like to start this post by saying;sometimes we get a jolt of reality on certain subjects in the most unusual of ways. Our abilities (especially leadership) come under scrutiny and calls for more of the learning process. In my quest for more I came across some lessons from some of the greatest leaders.

Read on.


8 leadership lessons from Nelson Mandela

Richard Stengel , who worked with Nelson Mandela on his autobiography, “Long Walk to Freedom” has an article in Time titled “Mandela: His 8 Lessons of Leadership”, these 8 lessons of leadership are:

1.Courage is not the absence of fear — it’s inspiring others to move beyond it. “Mandela was often afraid during his time underground, during the Rivonia trial that led to his imprisonment, during his time on Robben Island. ‘Of course I was afraid!’ he would tell me later. It would have been irrational, he suggested, not to be. ‘I can’t pretend that I’m brave and that I can beat the whole world.’ But as a leader, you cannot let people know. ‘You must put up a front.’ And that’s precisely what he learned to do: pretend and, through the act of appearing fearless, inspire others. It was a pantomime Mandela perfected on Robben Island, where there was much to fear. Prisoners who were with him said watching Mandela walk across the courtyard, upright and proud, was enough to keep them going for days. He knew that he was a model for others, and that gave him the strength to triumph over his own fear.”

2.Lead from the front — but don’t leave your base behind. “For Mandela, refusing to negotiate was about tactics, not principles. Throughout his life, he has always made that distinction. His unwavering principle — the overthrow of apartheid and the achievement of one man, one vote — was immutable, but almost anything that helped him get to that goal he regarded as a tactic. He is the most pragmatic of idealists.”

3.Lead from the back — and let others believe they are in front. “Mandela loved to reminisce about his boyhood and his lazy afternoons herding cattle. ‘You know," he would say, "you can only lead them from behind.’ He would then raise his eyebrows to make sure I got the analogy. As a boy, Mandela was greatly influenced by Jongintaba, the tribal king who raised him. When Jongintaba had meetings of his court, the men gathered in a circle, and only after all had spoken did the king begin to speak. The chief’s job, Mandela said, was not to tell people what to do but to form a consensus. "Don’t enter the debate too early," he used to say. … The trick of leadership is allowing yourself to be led too. ‘It is wise,’ he said, ‘to persuade people to do things and make them think it was their own idea.’”

4.Know your enemy — and learn about his favorite sport. “As far back as the 1960s, mandela began studying Afrikaans, the language of the white South Africans who created apartheid. His comrades in the ANC teased him about it, but he wanted to understand the Afrikaner’s worldview; he knew that one day he would be fighting them or negotiating with them, and either way, his destiny was tied to theirs.”

5.Keep your friends close — and your rivals even closer. “Many of the guests mandela invited to the house he built in Qunu were people whom, he intimated to me, he did not wholly trust. He had them to dinner; he called to consult with them; he flattered them and gave them gifts. Mandela is a man of invincible charm — and he has often used that charm to even greater effect on his rivals than on his allies. On Robben Island, Mandela would always include in his brain trust men he neither liked nor relied on.… Mandela believed that embracing his rivals was a way of controlling them: they were more dangerous on their own than within his circle of influence. He cherished loyalty, but he was never obsessed by it. After all, he used to say, ‘people act in their own interest.’ It was simply a fact of human nature, not a flaw or a defect.”

6.Appearances matter — and remember to smile:“When Mandela was running for the presidency in 1994, he knew that symbols mattered as much as substance. He was never a great public speaker, and people often tuned out what he was saying after the first few minutes. But it was the iconography that people understood. When he was on a platform, he would always do the toyi-toyi, the township dance that was an emblem of the struggle. But more important was that dazzling, beatific, all-inclusive smile.”

7.Nothing is black or white:“Life is never either/or. Decisions are complex, and there are always competing factors. To look for simple explanations is the bias of the human brain, but it doesn’t correspond to reality. Nothing is ever as straightforward as it appears. Mandela is comfortable with contradiction. As a politician, he was a pragmatist who saw the world as infinitely nuanced. Much of this, I believe, came from living as a black man under an apartheid system that offered a daily regimen of excruciating and debilitating moral choices: Do I defer to the white boss to get the job I want and avoid a punishment? Do I carry my pass? …. Mandela’s calculus was always, What is the end that I seek, and what is the most practical way to get there?”

8.Quitting is leading too:“Knowing how to abandon a failed idea, task or relationship is often the most difficult kind of decision a leader has to make. In many ways, Mandela’s greatest legacy as President of South Africa is the way he chose to leave it. When he was elected in 1994, Mandela probably could have pressed to be President for life — and there were many who felt that in return for his years in prison, that was the least South Africa could do.…. ‘His job was to set the course,’ says Ramaphosa, ‘not to steer the ship.’ He knows that leaders lead as much by what they choose not to do as what they do.”

SEIZE THE MOMENT(S)

Before reading this,I'll advise that you view this post as though I am speaking with you for this is how the words poured forth from deep down inside of me.

Read on!



Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will!

Create your own life and then go out and live it

There are times when life seems unpleasant to you, there are days when you strive to keep your head above the waters, there are seasons when everything seems to be working against you (even your desires are denied!), there are occassions when you feel cheated and dissappointed, there are days when you don't feel yourself, then you keep on asking yourself why me? what have I done? where can I go?
Some days are like that! but the end has not yet come. If you believe that disapointments can become blessings, if you believe that the darkness of night will lead to the dawn of a new day,then look up into the sky and cheer up.

A moment gone can never be regained so Seize the Moment; it might just be the difference between good and great.

Live today as if yesterday never existed, the future is bright,the sky is ur limit(no! starting point) and I hope you stay motivated,beautiful,and kindhearted until the next post and beyond

5 LESSONS ON CHOOSING A LIFE PARTNER

I got this from a friendand I thought you might be interested in this and have your say.

A relationship coach lays out his 5 GOLDEN RULES for evaluating the prospects of long-term success. When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake. Yet,with a divorce rate of close to 50 percent(In countries like the United States), it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr. or Mrs. Right! If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married, they'll say: "We're in love." I believe it is the #1 mistake people make when they date.Choosing a life partner should never be based on love.Though this may sound not politically correct, there's a profound truth here. Love is not the basis for getting married.Rather,love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone.You need a lot more.
Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION #1: Do we share a common life purpose? Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for 20 or 30 years (that's a long time to livewith someone), What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel,eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and more meaningful. You need a common life purpose. Two things can happen in a marriage. You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work,you need to know what you want out of life - bottom line-and marry someone who wants the same thing.

QUESTION #2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person? This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship. Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis of having good communication is trust -i.e. trust that I won't get "punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

QUESTION #3: Is he/she a mensch? A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you test? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be good and do the right thing." So ask about your significant other: What do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement. There are essentially two types of people in the world: People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personal comfort ahead of doingthe right thing.You need to know that before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION #4: How does he/she treat other people? The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure. Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure toothers or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, think about the following: How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc. How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and appreciation? Do they show respect? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them everything, you cannot expect that they'll have gratitude for you * who can't do nearly as much for them! Do they gossip and speak badly about others? Someone who gossips cannot be someone who loves others. You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly, will eventually treat you poorly as well.

QUESTION #5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married? Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention of trying to "improve" them after they're married. As acolleague of mine puts it, "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage ... for the worse!" If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them. In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart. It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure to ask questions that will help youget to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourselfin trouble because you didn't do your homework.

BEST WISHES!

Impressions and Expressions!

'The me I see is the me I'll be'; so says an anonymous man(or is it woman?) who inspires confidence in being comfortable in your own skin.

All the motivation in the world will not change you if deep within you there is a dislike, disapproval or discomfort in 'who you are'.

My take on this is:

1.First Impression lasts very long(you may never have an opportunity to change it!)
2.Habits form character and your character is you.
3.The right impression of yourself(from within you!) enhances expression, while the right impressions formed of you by others could bring you unbelievable possessions(believe me,it could!)

I recommend that you 'impress yourself', express yourself in many more positive ways.

In the final analysis, ''The things you see around you are tiny matters compared to that which lies within you
- Walt Emerson

BE PREPARED

Sometimes in our lives, we believe that the best days are here when there's a good plan,a series of achievements, a good woman and the world is seemingly at 'your feet' (or is it your fingertips?)

I write (sorry,'type') this because about three hours ago I received perhaps the greatest shocker of my 'recent' adult life.

You may want to attempt a wild guess but I'll advise that you to be a little patient and answer the following questions first.

1 What if the best laid plans come to naught?

2.What if your emotional fortunes took a plunge unexpectedly?

3. What if the people you love the most turn around to stab you without recourse to all you share?

The 'what ifs' form a major part of our daily experiences in this journey called life because assumptions could become reality (and rightly so too!).


Like Lord Baden Powell said and all of us who have ever been in the Boy Scout have heard many times over, BE PREPARED.

Life is full of unexpected twists so BE PREPARED or ......................

Will Tomorrow Come?

Some time ago in the bid to experiment with my latent talents and possibly make some money,I entered for a poetry competition.

Unknown to me, my first poem was a reflection of that which I FELT deep inside of me(the need to affect people) and the first question was will tomorrow come? I really will not tell you(dear reader?) the result of the competition .

You be the judge after enjoying the poem.

'As the sun rises, you realize that another day is born.
Aspirations are alive and perspiration continues.
Dusk approaches and the moon appears in a blanket-like sky.
You realize once again that the day is about to terminate.
What hast thou achieved today?
You grieve that the dreaded grave cometh closer
You want to make the best out of today
...... .. But will tomorrow come?'

Your guess is as good as mine.

CIAO(or is it chao?).

The Devil's Workshop

I remember this adage (or cliche) that 'an idle mind is the devils workshop' and shudder at the thought of it.

The reasons are simple.

There is (I dare say!) an embarassing array of tools at the disposal of the 'devil' notably among which is the largest storage equipment (did I say that?) any where in the world(da brain!), that valuable resource called time (plenty of it!) , energy in abundance and did I forget that thing called spirit of adventure?; no i didn't.

With that sort of workshop in every part of the world, I have no doubt that all the mischief, crisis and every thing negative will be mass produced a'la 'factory output' comparable only to the multinationals.

I really do not like to write much (thank God for typing!) but I'll close this first post with the following words.

a.Dream big
b.Get busy with something positive
c. Make a commitment to grow daily.

In this way, we get to reduce the 'workshops' and at that rate the devil will get 'fired' soon enough.